I’m sure whether to be extremely offended or honored to have so many people writing and commenting on my page asking when I’m going to write again. In one aspect honored that I actually touch or entertain people who well or deep. In another aspect, offended because when these people are leaving their contact information…. It comes up invalid or fake. The only thing that comes with these comments is WebPages saying click here. I know I’m not well-known and probably never will be, but the decency and respect of not using my pages for fake advertisement while leaving a “waited for” comment to draw me in is just heartless. The sad part is I’m the type of person that actually pays attention to the details. I pay attention to the views, the comments, the whereabouts these people are from. Does this sound weird or just expected? I was just curious anyway… now that I’ve gotten that off my chest.
I totally broke all rules today!! I did the absolutely unthinkable with my lovely lady. NO!!! Not that!!! It does involve a camera and some sensuality. NO!!! Not that either!!! LOL… I can see where this is going to go… I actually kissed her on camera at work today!!! I did it quick and cheap but I did it. I have never done this in my entire life. Well, she hasn’t been here my entire life but you get the idea. This was such a heart pounding life changing moment for me. The sad part is all my worries went out the door once I realized the eyes weren’t even in the building, but just a minute more and they would have been. Sad that this is the subject of the day when there are much more important things that we should all be concerned about. Sad that the thought or view of a woman kissing a woman is to be a subject of remorse or joy more than the subjects of the real issues of this world.
I mean for Religions it’s the Anti-Christ we are to be worried about. For the hunters it’s the gun control we are to be worried about. For the LGBTQ community it’s the equality right we are to be worried about. For the conspiracy theorists it’s the RFID chip and military takeover we are to be worried about. For the mothers it’s the school funding and programs we are to be worried about. For Michigan it’s our close-minded stubborn Republican takeover that we are to be worried about (opinions are allowed). For the elderly and war served it’s the health care to be worried about. Now in all reality all these issues have their ups and downs and believable points and non believable points; however these issues should be at the heart of our employers and employees. We shouldn’t wondering if we hired the wrong person because they are kissing or living with someone we aren’t attracted to or believe they should be attracted to.
Our daily life should not incur the worries of our world of financial support ending because someone in our work circle saw or thought they saw two people together that “mom taught them” shouldn’t be together. Our daily life should be about keeping ourselves and our families healthy and strong. They should be about planning for a good education and sense of goals and reasoning. Yes, there is a lot going on in today’s world and if you have your eyes closed even a smidgen … you will definitely being missing out on a lot, but your eyes being open to that is way more productive and efficient than judging others around you by their lives and life styles or personal choices. That’s like not letting someone into a grocery store because they have a tattooed cross on their arm! Does that make any sense? Who cares if you don’t like tattoos or even believe in the meaning of the cross! All you should have to worry about is if that “customer” is going to purchase something. Same thing!!!!
I’ve gotten a lot of compliments lately on my well-rounded relationship with my lovely lady and my children. I get told a lot that it’s rare to see such well minded and highly intelligent children. All I got to say is (you don’t live with them) lol… jk… I’m proud of them! I also get compliments all the time on how good my partner and I look together and how well we mash as mates. I have to admit a whole year with no real arguments or fights was a huge WOW! I thought fighting and arguing was part of a relationship, even if it was a daily thing that seemed to have no end. I suppose when you find the right one or in my case when the right one finds you… there’s no need for the theatrics and dumb arguments. Sometimes it’s just better to agree to disagree and realize that’s ok. I have no shame in my awesome relationship with my lovely lady!! However I know and understand that it’s is basic decency and couth to keep your affections to a low murmur in public or otherwise.
I guess I’m always on the look out to please other people and always searching for more ways to do it. This could be my downfall. I will readily admit it if in fact it is a downfall; however who would have to decide that outside of biased parties? Me… of course! So in my downfall I can’t just up and judge myself as a failure when I don’t feel there’s anything that is to be failed. Sure helping others can cause some downs, but even if it’s a ratio of 1 to 10 I would rather have my one up and silently smile at my accomplishment. I guess that’s what comes from being raised to appreciate anything that comes your way fully. Regardless if it came from my 3rd cousin removed grandmother or my new friend down the street or some millionaire that got money burning in his pocket… I appreciate it!!! So if it’s me doing the giving one little tiny possibility at a time… I’m doing pretty damn well if you ask me!!!!
I will say though as days pass, more and more people at my employment seem to be pretty ok and understanding of my relationship (not that it’s any of their business) with my lovely lady and our very beautiful children. I get questions and concerns of their status and they are actually genuine concerns. I know WOW right? When people ask how you are doing these days, usually you have to be short and say good or awesome or ok regardless because if you have any more than that… yawn… it doesn’t really matter… I don’t need to know your life story… expressions usually follow. It’s good to have people who seem to really care. Especially when you feel your whole life just went to hell in a hand basket.
I have decided I’m probably the cheapest and easiest person to feed and keep happy at work. I have my little bag that comes in with me every day and believe it or not… it’s pretty simple.
Pumpkin seeds for snacking (I’m anemic so I need the iron)
Chips for snacking and adding (I crave the salt and it’s a filler)
Cup – o – noodles for my meal (I fill easily and quickly and the spices warm me up)
Coffee creamers (makes drinking nasty coffee a breeze)
Pop (later in the evening with my meal)
Cheese fish’s (changes the taste every now and then)
Sounds weird right? Believe it or not, as long as I have these things … I’m a pleasure to be around! I can’t eat too big of meals cause it will put me to sleep… lol not kidding. Besides what’s a good meal without a menthol cigarette to boot? So my complete oddity has been revealed. Well part of it. I could write a book of weird toilet stories I’ve been told, but that’s another day down many roads from now. 😉
So here I am in the complete pride of my country finally being able to accept me for me and my family for what it is and brings. The thought that one day I will proudly take my lady by the hand and say “I do” leads me to another day of bright shiny eyes and hopes of my children’ futures and what they are to come into.
I’m reminded of a poem I wrote a few years ago. It comes from my book, “Whispering a Lady’s Secret”. It seems to speak pretty clearly of my current situation so I figured I would share it:
With her life in danger
She lives without fear
Has a girl she holds close
She holds proud without tear
Walking her grounds
She makes her decision
Whether or not
To follow her vision
She has many dreams
And stuck with a feeling
Her girl has a secret
She’s afraid of revealing
Trying to be normal
In a life so damn cruel
Finding such a struggle
To become quite a dual
She has a lot of past
Including deaths to count
Too much to handle
Quite a problem to mount
Her decision holds clear
She won’t be held back
From her goals she has in mind
And slight perfections she tends to lack
Everything ahead of her
She wishes she already knew
What her love life had in store
At a time she trusted so few
Without a chance to explain
With herself she’s so confused
In a soul so locked up
With a contentment barely amused
This isn’t supposed to mean something to you, but if it does it was meant to be for you to read it. It does mean something to me and though doesn’t speak perfectly of everything current, it tells a little bit. I will leave you with one more thing tonight and again you can take it how you want to, but it’s real and that’s all I know how to be…
We’ve all heard the phrase “loves me,
loves me not”. Why do we foolishly
count on a simple petal and the chances
it might actually say we love someone
or not. Love comes from and with God.
Without God, there’s nothing but vain
in the making. With God we don’t need
that innocent petal of that beautiful
flower to tell us if we love someone or
not. With God we can treat the flower
with respect and learn ourselves of love.
Not the love of which falls to the
ground with a simple yet so complicated
phrase, but the love that can’t fall or be
pushed to a ground that doesn’t exist in
it’s presence. The love that doesn’t end
with the smell or beauty of a flower but
starts with the respect of a flower. That
just starts its life and growth with the
help and protection of the sun, trees,
and air. Yes, the love that starts with a
simple drop of rain and continues
throughout nature’s course. With God’s
help and provision, this love can be
achieved not only in a simple flower but
also in the world’s flower. In the world’s
beauty if we’d just listen and learn.
“Dedicated to all those foolish people”
- Janu-worry!!!!!! (busibgal21.wordpress.com)
- Shah On Worrying (danedormio.wordpress.com)
- What Should We Be Worried About In 2013? (wnyc.org)
- Appreciation (sallywillis.wordpress.com)
- Imagine Writing an Unpleasant Letter to Yourself (eagleman6788.wordpress.com)
- Nothing but Love Can Be Cause of Joy (celiaelaine.wordpress.com)